2004-03-29 @ 11:04 a.m.
I've been mulling over the events of the last couple of weeks months the past year and I can truly say that I am so embarrassed, defeated and all around stomped low that I am unable to keep on track.
I know the statistics say that only a minor percentage of people actually keep the weight that they have lost off, and I have said from day one that I will NOT be one of those people that gained it back.
But I did gain it back, and part of the purpose of losing the weight besides feeling better and looking better was to eventually have another baby.
I think part of my reason for having not liking being pregnant was because I was so overweight to start off. I was about 65 pounds overweight at that point. I couldn't fit into any cutie little preggo clothes, and had to wear "Just My Size Plus Size" clothes just to get by. (And I didn't like it one damn bit.)
So now that Jamie will be starting all day K4 in the fall, we have been talking about what I can do to earn money and also kicking around the idea of having a baby.
I really want to have another baby, and part of me wants to lose weight so I can get pregnant, but the other part of me says "To heck with the diet, you are never going to lose enough to be happy."
So I've we've decided that instead of saying "When I lose 50 pounds, we will start trying again" it's "I will do my best to stay OP and lose weight, and in September, we will start trying again." No goal amount, just a time frame.
I've come up with some basic rules to live by, and hopefully help my wieght loss, family relationships and house chaos.1. As I eat, ask myself, "Self, is this food really going to help me lose weight?" and then eat or throw away accordingly.
2. Try not to make losing weight a huge deal. Go about it quietly.
3. Eat less carbs, but not carb free.
4. Exercise. And I mean daily.
5. Get Steve and Jamie on the same boat as I am eating wise.
6. Clean up dishes after every meal - don't let them sit until the next day.
7. Pick up house every morning before M and E come over.
8. Get everyone, and I mean everyone to pick up after themselves.
9. Say no once in a while. I'm not superwoman, and I can't help everyone all the time.
points eaten today
done for exercise
Older Entries
I'm baaaaaack! - 2005-04-03
Computers R Us? - 2004-07-21
Salad Heaven - 2004-04-14
A New Outlook - 2004-03-29
Woe Woe Woe, Oh Ko! - 2004-03-04
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